so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Randomize
