New invention idea: vibrating tampons
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Operation Purity has been aborted
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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