In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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