yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
