4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
