She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
