Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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