The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
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Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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