I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize