if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
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Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
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i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
This toilet bowl is my home.