he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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