i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
