It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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