I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
