We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
