so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
