i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
