i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I made him laugh his dick is mine
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
