how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
