there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
try to milk me bitch
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
