I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
