Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I just forgot I was standing up.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize