What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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