Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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