Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
The uberlube is also flammable
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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