Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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