3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
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