used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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