I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
