guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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