My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
