can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
The beers last night were like the tears from god
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
