there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Randomize
