Soap is not a condiment
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
the day after is always just damage control
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
