Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize