Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
