What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
