please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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