Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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