I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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