I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
