Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
