he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
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