I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
