everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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