He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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