You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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