dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
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