just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize