Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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